Trauma, abuse and bereavement / Category / Emile Du Toit / September 3rd 2014
This 3rd blog in the series of 10 on preventing being raped takes a look at who is actually out there committing rape, and examines some statistics on acquaintance rape. We examine risk factors in acquaintance rape and why women so often do not fight back during date rape. Lastly, we take a look at some statistics on college acquaintance / date rape.
After reading this article you might also want to refer to my article 15 Practical Ways to Avoid being date raped.
He is not hiding in the bushes!
Here is the scary reality of rapist relations to their victims
I suspect that this will be a shock to many out there. There is often such a strong focus on home invasion rapes and rapes outside clubs due to spiked drinks and so forth that women fail to see the danger right beside them!
In a complex and stressful world we should at least be able to feel safe at home, and with those we trust and love. Sadly this is the place where we are most likely to be raped, and these are the people most likely to rape us. Research demonstrates that women’s perception of danger around loved ones and acquaintances is far lower than their actual risk 9..
Women are too trusting of people they know!
The following specific factors are related to an increased risk of acquaintance or date rape 8. :
Sadly, women are also less likely to resist rape by people they know 1. 10. 12.. Presumably this has to do with stronger psychosocial barriers that they need to overcome in order to resist effectively. We will discuss Psychosocial Barriers to Rape in part 5 of this series.
In fact in the rape of college students as high as 84% of rapists are known to the victim 6.. In this particular sample it is felt that one of the reasons for this is that women have just achieved a high level of freedom after being under their parent’s roof up until then, and do not yet have the coping skills or maturity to protect themselves.
Quite often in acquaintance and date rape the perpetrator and/or the victim actually doesn’t believe that rape has been committed. In these coercive rape situations physical violence is seldom present.
Women also suffer from prejudiced male-centric psychosocial beliefs!
As a consequence they doubt whether they were raped, feel guilty and often end up shouldering much of the ‘blame’ for being raped.
Society has supported male domination of women for so long that often the women themselves do not view date rape as rape!
Because some women feel responsible for being raped does not mean that the incident is any less traumatic or scarring for them. In some ways it is worse due to the blame that they often shoulder themselves. These women experience the same traumatization and post traumatic symptoms as in any other rape, including:
It is often harder for women who were date raped to resolve trauma as they feel guilty for what happened and also often are too afraid to speak out.
School, college and early years in a career place you at the highest risk of being raped. You are particularly vulnerable when in a university residence as most people are meeting lots of new friends and experimenting on lots of dates. It is an exciting time in the lives of most young people. Nevertheless, women are way too trusting and appear to live in a bit of a bubble in terms of who those rapist actually are.
Going back to that courtroom somewhere in the more fashionable end of the Milky Way, the indictment on humanity rings no louder than in this statement:
Human beings particularly cannot trust those that we know and love the most!
I would strongly urge you at this point to read the blog on 15 Practical Ways to Avoid being date raped.
Like what you read? Why not share it with your friends